May 13th.
Not even two weeks passed since I came home from the retreat, yet I felt so
free without all of the heaviness weighing me down like before. I couldn’t
believe I found the strength to do it, but I somehow let both of them, (all
three of them), go. I moved on without the kids I’d loved as my own, without
the questions hovering over me, without the constant search to know why.
I gave them back. God held them in His hands. I accepted I’d never know
anything about them again, and I knew I could trust my God to continue to love and
care for them. Our investment into their lives completed a part of our story
and of theirs, but now I trusted Him to provide them a family in His time.
He would not leave them as orphans. I didn’t need to know how or when. I
only knew He’d already prepared a future for them. I didn’t need to know the
answers anymore. I only needed to remember God always had and still held
control.
I truly believed I’d seen the last of Julian’s sweet e-mail messages.
God completely surprised me when I found another priceless message now two
months later.
“Do you, by
chance, have any pictures of my brother and sister on your computer that you
can send me?” He wanted to create a virtual photo album of the three of them
online via a social networking website.
“Of course I have more pictures. I’m at work right now, but I will send
them to you as soon as I get home this evening.” Overwhelming emotion hit each
key as I typed an immediate response.
Julian and I ended up connecting live via that same social networking
website, opening up a whole new world of communication between us, bridging the
huge continental gap dividing us. Still twenty-five hundred miles apart, we
could finally see pictures of each other and “talk” anytime via the computer. Constant conversation followed almost daily.
Thus began our quest to get to know this “forgotten” sibling.
What a handsome boy! I loved looking through current pictures he
posted of himself. I even found a picture of him wearing a sweat shirt we sent
for him and Juan David at Christmas, proof that they received the box and
shared the contents.
I never saw this coming. Julian and I built a unique relationship
rather quickly. I heard God whisper to me, “It’s not over yet. Did you not know
I would complete what I began the day those two faces appeared on your computer
screen?”
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